Q: What are the three biggest tragedies in a man's life?
A: Life sucks, job sucks, and the wife doesn't.

A couple just married were happy with the whole thing. He was happy
with the Hole and she was happy with the Thing......

Marriage is the only war where you get to sleep with the enemy.

I tried phone sex once, but the holes in the dialer were too small.

There are three stages of sex in a man's life: Tri Weekly, Try Weekly,
and Try Weakly

Panties: Not the best thing on earth, but next to the best thing on
earth.

There are only two four letter words that are offensive to men -
'don't' and 'stop', unless they are used together.